A Main Character

= Euphema Balls (Permanent Marker) =

Abstract
On the first day, God created the universe. On the second day, God created Permanent Marker (eventually Euphie). On the third day, Permanent Marker killed God. On the fourth day, Permanent Marker created a sister and named her Euphema Bussy. And thus begins the Euphieverse as we know it.

The Beginning
In a tragic lapse in judgement God decided to make a being in their own image. Born as Permanent Marker, Euphie has cycled through many names but has chosen Euphema Balls to be his proper name. Euphema has attended many of the most important historical events, such as the birth of Jesus Christ, the fall of Rome, the Boston Tea Party, and the assassination of Archduke Franz Ferdinand. Euphema mostly lived as a hermit for the first few billion years of his life, but he had a hand in shaping world politics in humanity's early years.

Being immortal, Permanent Marker is immune to most physical attacks, and he cannot die naturally. Permanent Marker is as old as time itself and is billions of years old. He will be here when the Earth is swallowed by the sun. No one can run from Permanent Marker

1948
In 1948, musician Stan Jones was walking through the open plain one fateful night. A low roar thundered through the sky, and he looked up to see a yellow station wagon in the sky. The driver rode on by him, singing loudly out his windows. The driver was Euphema Balls who regaled Jones with a song of how he was late for dinner. Inspired and awed by this experience, Stan Jones would go on to write the hit song "Ghost Riders In The Sky."

Hard Time
In 1952, Euphema Balls was wrongfully convicted on charges of terrorism. He served a brief stint of 50 days in a state penitentiary where he would kill many of his fellow inmates. Euphema fought many different gangs while in prison and earned himself a reputation as a tough guy. During his hard time, Permanent Marker created a writing utensil capable of leaving its mark for all eternity; which he dubbed the Permanent Marker, named after himself. He would make money selling his markers to other inmates and correctional staff. Now being able to afford a lawyer, Euphema went to court to fight his case, where he won his freedom. After being released from prison, the permanent marker would go on to sell internationally and make Euphie millions of dollars. However, with his name being Permanent Marker at the time, many people would make fun of him, mistakenly believing he is named after the marker. Permanent Marker would then change his name to Euphema Balls, named after his sister Euphema Bussy.

Vietnam War
In 1964, the United States actively entered the Vietnam Civil War. Thousands of Americans were drafted into the military, and many more protested against this. Euphema Balls was an avid anti-war protestor during the Vietnam War Era. He did a cover of the hit song "California Dreaming", which he called "Euphema Dreaming." He would perform this cover at college campuses, supermarket parking lots, and big box stores.

1970s
During the 1970s and much of the early '80s, Euphema Balls lived as a drifter, traveling all across North America in his trusty ShamWow. Set for life with his earnings from the permanent marker, Euphie would spend lots of money attending expensive rock concerts. Euphema lived a fast paced and hedonistic lifestyle for almost two decades.

1988
In 1988, Euphema Balls was passing through Rhode Island when he saw an ad for a local band. The band ASS was playing at a local venue and Euphema decided to give the group a try. The lead guitarist of the band was a man named Axel Steel. Axel could not speak English; the only word he knew how to say was "ass", which is what inspired the band's name. Axel was an incredible guitarist, one of the best that Euphema had ever seen. Axel would kill multiple patrons at this concert, which lead to the Grim Reaper arriving. While collecting the souls of the dead, Axel shot his guitar's laser at the Grim Reaper, killing him instantly. Euphema Balls was so impressed that he granted Axel godlike powers after the show. Axel is now a demigod in the Euphie Pantheon. While not as powerful as Balls or Bussy, Ass is an incredibly powerful figure in the Euphieverse.

October 23, 2077
On October 23, 2077, the world was plunged into nuclear war. Euphema Balls was in god-realm at this time.

Post-apocalypse
Euphema Balls found himself in the Mojave wasteland, where he drifts from town to town. Euphema uses his godly powers to complete quests for people who pay him in bottle caps. He travels the wastes with is trusty companion, Veronica, who is 10 stories tall. Euphema found the wreckage of the ShamWow and is currently trying to rebuild the car.